If you're a parent of a toddler, then dealing with temper tantrums or meltdowns are probably a daily occurrence. Young kids who are still learning how to talk and express themselves are easily frustrated. They want something, but they don't know how to say (or get) it. As a result, they resort to screaming, crying, throwing themselves on the floor, whining, pitching a hissy fit, or worse yet, having a complete meltdown.

Getting your kids to listen during these episodes is not an easy task, so it may also be common for you as a parent or caregiver to get frustrated at the same time. As a Dad, I have a particularly hard time dealing with meltdowns. I hate whining, and I would rather ignore bad behavior than validate it with a sympathetic response. Toddlers require a little more patience and understanding though, so I have forced myself to try and help my young son get past these episodes and learn how to express himself more clearly up front.

I've read several articles on how to prevent temper tantrums or meltdown, but the one that stood out to me most was a simple list of preventative measures at wikiHow:

1. Maintain daily routines. Toddlers and preschoolers need to feel comfortable and secure, and they do not deal well with unpredictability. Keep things predictable by setting regular bedtimes and mealtimes. Hunger and sleepiness are probably the most common triggers of tantrums, and these can largely be avoided by keeping a regular schedule. Try to wean toddlers off unscheduled naps, and minimize the occurrence of extended absences from familiar surroundings.

2. Prepare your child for changes. Obviously, you can’t keep the same routine forever. Make sure you give your child plenty of warning and explanation well in advance of significant changes, e.g., his first day of preschool, and prepare him for smaller changes, as well. For example, if you’ve spent the afternoon at the swimming pool, let your child know you will be leaving in 15 minutes. Soften the uncomfortable blow of abrupt changes in environment or activities by giving the child time to adjust. Also, prepare your child for difficulties before he or she tries some new activity. A child may expect to be able to take on the world, but when it comes down to it, they have trouble doing most new tasks. Explain a given activity is difficult and may require many attempts, and be patient if the child becomes frustrated.

3. Be firm. If a child senses he can sway your decisions or coerce you with tantrums, it is reasonable for the child to use tantrums to get his way. Make sure your child knows you make the decisions, and don’t change your mind in response to bad behavior.

4. Choose your battles. Before you deny a child’s request, ask yourself whether the request may indeed be reasonable. Does your son want a pre-dinner snack if dinner’s running a little late? Why not give it to him? You may avoid a tantrum, and besides, he just may be really hungry. Don’t try to enforce rules just for the sake of rules, but analyze the situation before you make a decision. Once you make the decision don’t back down.

5. Give your child choices. Beginning in the toddler years, children seek increasing autonomy, and if they feel as though they have no control over their lives tantrums may ensue. While you can’t reasonably give young children much independence, you can offer them simple choices so they can feel more in control. For example, at breakfast, give your child a choice between oatmeal and cereal. Make sure either choice you give is acceptable to you, and avoid asking open-ended questions such as, “What would you like for breakfast?” You may get an unreasonable answer, and then be forced to deny the child his choice.

6. Pay attention. Children need a lot of attention, and if they don’t get enough they will seek more. You’ve probably heard “even bad attention is better than no attention,” and for children this is true. Make sure to spend plenty of time with your child and to be responsive to his or her basic needs for food, shelter, and comfort. If a child tends to react to a particular item, preventing related tantrums is as easy as keeping the item out of his or her mind.

I'm very good at keeping my son on a routine when I'm taking care of him, and I don't have any problem being firm with my decisions about what he can and cannot do. I struggle, though, at times, with picking my battles and paying attention to warning signals that a meltdown might be on the way.

There is no way to prevent meltdowns 100% of the time, but I have found that following these simple steps does decrease the frequency of Ty's temper tantrums.

Got any good tips? Please share them in the comments!